ID checks and your privacy
Why NH Dating checks IDs, exactly what happens to yours, what we never keep, and other ways to verify if you'd rather not send a photo.
October 30, 2026 · Paul
A lot of you have asked about the ID check, and that's fair. Showing your ID to strangers on the internet should make you think twice. This post explains why we do it, exactly what happens, and what we never keep. It also covers other ways to verify if sending a photo isn't for you.
Why we check IDs at all
NH Dating is a dating community, and that comes with responsibilities a regular Discord server doesn't have.
- Keeping minors out. This is the big one. A dating server has to be sure everyone in it is an adult. Asking people to type their birthday isn't enough, because anyone can lie on a form.
- Stopping catfishing and fake accounts. When everyone has shown a real person their face and age, it's much harder to run a fake profile or pretend to be someone else.
- Making it safer to meet up. You'll still want to be careful (more on that below), but you know the person you're talking to passed a check by a real person.
We would rather do one quick, human check than run a server where nobody knows who anyone is.
What actually happens
You're accepted
When we accept your application, the site adds you to the server. At first you can only see one area: the ID check.
A private channel opens
The bot opens a private channel that only you and the verification team can see. Nobody else in the server can see it, and it never shows up anywhere else.
You show your ID
You post a photo of a government photo ID, or ask for a video call instead (see below). We only need two things from it: your photo and your date of birth.
A person checks it
Someone on the verification team compares the photo with you and the age with your application. There's no automated scanner and no outside company.
Everything is deleted
As soon as you're checked, pass or fail, the bot deletes the entire channel, including your photo and every message in it.
What we keep and what we don't
| We keep | We never keep |
|---|---|
| That you passed the check | Any photo, copy or scan of your ID |
| The date you passed | Your ID number, address or barcode |
| Which team member checked you | Your full legal name from the ID |
| Any recording of a video call |
That's it. We don't download the photo, take screenshots, or write anything down from it. The whole channel is deleted, not just the image.
How to cover your ID
You don't have to show us everything on your ID. Before you take the photo, cover:
- Your address
- Your ID or license number
- The barcode on the back (just don't photograph the back)
- Anything else you'd like to hide, like your middle name
Leave your face and date of birth visible. A sticky note or your thumb works fine. If we can see those two things, you'll pass.
Other ways to verify
If you don't want a photo of your ID to exist anywhere, even for a few minutes, you have options.
Live video call
Ask for a video call in your ID check channel and someone from the verification team will call you on Discord. You hold your ID up to the camera next to your face, they confirm your age, and the call ends. Nothing is uploaded, nothing is recorded, and there's no image to delete afterward. You can cover the same details on your ID as with a photo.
This is the most private way to verify, and it takes about a minute.
Photo with everything covered
If a call isn't convenient, a photo with everything except your face and date of birth covered is completely fine. It's deleted with the channel as soon as you're checked.
Something else
If neither of those works for you, say so in your ID check channel or message a member of the staff. We'd rather find a way that works for you than lose a good member over it.
How the rest of the system protects you
The ID check is only one part. Here's how everything else is set up.
- No passwords to steal. You log in with Discord, so we never see or store a password.
- Logins can't be copied out of our database. Login sessions are stored as a one-way scrambled code, not the real thing.
- Encrypted storage and connections. The database is encrypted where it's stored, and every connection to the site uses HTTPS.
- Profiles are private. Nobody can browse profiles. Someone only sees yours after you both agree to
/match. - No ads, no tracking, no selling. There are no ad networks or analytics trackers on the site, and we don't sell or share your information with anyone.
- You can delete everything. "Withdraw and delete" on the home page removes your application and matches.
A few honest limits
- The ID check confirms age only. It isn't a background check. Meet in public the first few times, tell a friend where you're going, and arrange your own ride.
- If you're accepted, other members can see a few roles on your Discord profile, like your gender, age range and county. The privacy policy lists exactly which ones.
Still have questions?
Ask in the server or message a member of the staff. If you want every detail, the privacy policy has the full list of what we store and what we don't, and the terms cover the rest.